Chortling, a gleeful and breathy way of laughing or chuckling, has become the latest craze among Wuxi Expats. Whether they are telling a joke, praising their King Gorzo the Mighty, talking about Ontario, Canada Expats, or reflecting on the mishaps of China Expats who don't live in Wuxi, Wuxi Expatdomites have made a point of it to laugh and slap their knees to show their mirth and joy at life in the Wuxi China Expatdom.
Anywhere one goes in the WCE these days, one can see Expats trying to top each other in the elaborateness of their chortling. Some Wuxi Expats have taken to laughing while on their backs or trying to perform a Prisyadka Dance in order to enhance their chortling. One Wuxi Expat has worn a dress shirt so tight that he hopes by chortling, he can pop off its buttons. High society Wuxi Expats who own Shetland Ponies have deliberately fallen off them in order to have a reason to chuckle. Patrons of Wuxi Expat Pubs have deliberately fallen into nearby canals for a laugh. Wuxi Expats from Ontario, Canada have gleefully peed-peed and poo-poohed in their pants.
Some have benefited financially from the craze. A book on how to chortle has become an instant best-seller in the Wuxi China Expatdom. As well, posters of Duston Short wearing a tie and split-ass pants have sold out. "The fat, short and lazy English Teacher, from Ontario, Canada, trying to look professional is the most ridiculous of sights and looking at it is a great way to raise the level of one's chortling!" said Ed McMahon, a side kick on a late night Wuxi China Expatdom television show. Hardy's Har Har Comedy Club has had to call in the fire hoses commanded by Marcus Linius Crassus to cool the ardor of the chortling now done by its patrons. "With business so good these days because of the chortling craze, we can afford to call in the fire brigade!" said the comedy club's owner Willy Aardvark Crazy Kook Yakushev Hardy.
His Majesty, the King of the Wuxi China Expatdom, Gorzo the Mighty has joined in on the craze. When asked what he thought of the intellectual abilities of U.S. Vice President Joe Biden, His Majesty laughed and slapped his knees for an hour before finally exclaiming that that was the funniest question he had ever been asked.
Even the most stolid of Wuxi Expats: the Germans, and Chief Inspector Harry Callahan of the Wuxi China Expatdom Police Squad have chortled. "German Precision Chortling! I tell ya! He he he he woo he woo he haa wo he he ha ha woah he ha ha ha ha hah hah he he he woo hoe hoe hoe he he ha ha ha HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Boy! He he he ha ha ha! Does it make my! Ha ha he he ho ho woe hoe woe hoe he he ha he hah hee haw hee hae! Day! said C.I. Callahan in an interview with Pierce Double Happiness.
Wuxi Expats from England, who pride themselves on having witty and sophisticated humor, are chortling as well. Some have bought ten gallon hats because they believe chortling is something done extensively in the state of Texas. An English Expat was overheard, at Gambay's Pub, saying the following: " I say Teddy Boy! Ha ha ha he he he hoe hoe hoe woe woe woe yozza! I say! He he he hoe hoe hoe ah ha ha ha ha ah ha ha ha ah ha ha ha ha! Teddy! Have you! He he he ha ha ah ha ah ah ha ha ha ah ha ha! Seen Neddy! He has my! hoe hoe hoe hoe hoe hoe! Cricket Bats! Ha ha ha ah ha ha ha ah ha ha! Oops! I fell down! Ha ha ha!"
Yet more proof (if any were needed) that the WCE
ReplyDeleteis the greatest Expatdom there ever was.
But is there a difference, perhaps subtle, between chortling, and guffawing??
Not that I know of. But like the old Naturism versus Nudism question, a subtle difference in meaning will ultimately be determined by the behavior and philosophy of its respective practitioners.
ReplyDeleteThe Naturists have shown their superiority in every way to the Nudists.
We will have to wait and see how the Guffawers in the WCE will behave. Seeing how the Chrotlers have established themselves, the Guffawers will have to find ways to differentiate themselves and stand out.
Are the WCE Guffawers going to have an organizing convention?
Are those three in the photo Expat English teachers? From their
ReplyDeleteappearance, and care-free facial expressions, I'd guess that they must be.
Andis, your clarification is a little worrying.
There are indications that factionalism is rearing it's ugly (yet laughing) head.
We all know that Expats at The Cactus Panda snort and snicker a lot.
Aussie Expats, denizens of The Participle, begin with a flared-nostril snore-like inhalation, which then escalates into fullblown backward-bending belly laughter.
And then there are those well-heeled Expats, in Gambays' Liberace & Lace
Lounge, who titter (chortling with the lips firmly shut).
I really hope that this doesn't escalate into another civil war. Then there'd be Lord Haw Haw, Hitler's Dog jokes, and all that again.
(do we?). :)