Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Wuxi Expats contemplate suicide after clouds block solar eclipse.

Many Wuxi Expats are contemplating killing themselves because of the Solar Eclipse they weren't able to see.

Said one Wuxi Expat: "All I have worked for has come for nought! The months I spent getting drunk in bars. The months I spent befriending strange people from Toronto, New Zealand, Berlin, Copenhagen, and Winnipeg! The summers I endured in this intolerable humidity! All so I could see the solar eclipse here! And what happens!?! It rains."

Other Wuxi Expats have seen it as proof of biblical revelation and found religion. "Wuxi really is a den of iniquity. God hath smote the eclipse has punishment." sayeth one.

Others are happy that they didn't get retinal burn.

Sayeth a Upper Delingan on hearing of the Wuxi Expat plight: "At least they are far away from asshole Lower Delinga. We are stuck next to those bastards and have to smell them everyday. Darn prevailing northerlies. There ought to be a law...."

No comments:

Post a Comment