Thursday, June 21, 2012

Census shows Fifty Million Expats living in Wuxi, China

There are  50,226,766.683 Expats, not including colonials, living in the Wuxi China Expatdom according to its latest census.  

The census broke down the population by home country revealing the following numbers:

Canadians 35,001,867
Americans 11,001,776
English 1,401,066
Germans 1,301,945.683
French 1,281,968.6
Mexicans 115,115
Italians 111,929
Ozzies 4,445
Kiwis 3,002
Scots 3,000
Irish 435
Poles 125.9
Russians 78
Swedes 9
Danes 4.5
Total 50,226,766.683


Andis Kaulins, a Canadian teaching English in Wuxi, reacting to the census, expressed surprise that there were so many people.  "I can go days without seeing a Laowei in Wuxi.   Where the heck do they congregate?" asked Kaulins, who is not to be confused with two other persons named Andis Kaulins also living in the WCE.

Kaulins also expressed surprise that there were so many Canadians living in Wuxi.  "I also find it hard to believe that there are more Canadians living in the Wuxi China Expatdom that in Canada itself!  I suppose they want liberty!  A thing you can't get in Canada anymore!"

Others couldn't understand why there weren't so many Australians.  "They seem to own all the Expat pubs!  They seem to do most of the drinking in the Expat pubs!  And the personality of Archduke Harry Moore so stands out that you would think there were 100 million Australians living in the WCE!  Such is the force of the Archduke's personality!" said Prime Minister Mango.

Many Wuxi also Expats expressed anger that there were so many Swedes and Danes living in the Wuxi China Expatdom.  "One of those bastards is too much and we got thirteen and a half of them!  Phew!" said Wally Droop, owner of the Chestnut and Walnut Pubs.

The census also recorded the religious affiliations of Wuxi China Expats.  Seventy Five percent told the census they were Roman Catholics.  Sixty Seven percent said they were protestants.  Eighty Nine percent told the census they were Jewish.  Five percent said they were Buddhists.  Five Wuxi Expats admitted to being atheists.  

"The census done by the WCE government was for curiosity's sake only and wasn't going to be used by WCE bureaucrats!" insisted Prime Minister Mango.

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