Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Is Robert Downey Jr Coming Back to the Wuxi China Expatdom?



The reaction to rumours that Robert Downey Junior is returning to the Wuxi China Expatdom, has been mixed.


Downey, who left the Expatdom in 2011 under a cloud of disgrace after an English teaching career that saw him teach everywhere in Wuxi, is said to be contemplating a return after finding life outside the WCE to not be to his liking.


Reaction to his return, among prominent Wuxi Expats, has ranged from pandemonium to severe negativity.


Pub owner Wally Droop says he is praying for Downey's return because he hasn't yet paid off his debts from his last stint in Wuxi. Droop does admit that the charismatic Downey did bring in extra patrons to the pub who would drink and listen to Downey's anecdotes, witticisms, and excuses.


Disgraced former Wuxi China Expatdom midget sumo wrestling champion Duston Short, currently on trial for molesting himself, says he is ecstatic now that he has heard about of Downey's return. "No longer will I and Thor Lyndon be so infamous for being late for work, calling in sick, or getting fired from every school!"


Blogger Andrew Cowlinch whose satirical character Fidel Guevara Carlyle-Bassington is said to be loosely based on Downey tells the WCE Blog that he hopes Downey has cleaned up his act by having cured himself of alcoholism and drug-addiction, realized the fatal conceit of his socialism, and maybe furthermore realizing that planning ahead and showing up on time are not just bourgeois conceits to be scoffed at.


English Teacher and self-described man-about-town Farok Bagolli is reportedly very angry about a possible Downey return to the WCE. "If I see that guy I'll kill him! If you know what I mean!" Rumours abound that that two Sexpats are enemies after having been neighbors.


So far, no exact date has been set for Downey's return. In a brief interview with the WCE Blog, Downey said he was looking for the right opportunity. "I don't want to be screwed like every other time I held a job in Wuxi!" he said.

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