Monday, August 13, 2012

Wuxi Expats Make Space History as Zhanshen 6 Passes the Moon on the way to Mars




The five Wuxi Expats on Zhanshen 6, the Wuxi China Expatdom Mission to the planet Mars, became the first humans to ever go beyond the Moon's orbit on Sunday.

On Saturday, their souped up Saturn V5 Rocket   successfully lifted off from the plains of the Meicun District as a crowd of  fifty million prisyadka-dancing and hot dog eating Wuxi Expats watched.   The five man Zhanshen 6 crew:  Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Air Force Commander Gregory Peck;  Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Navy Commander Lloyd Bridges;  Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Mounted Police Squad Commander Chief Inspector Harry Callahan; Co-Manager of Gambay's Pub Fred Minkleman; and  best-selling author, Wuxi China Expatdom Minister of Colonies and the President of the Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society, Archduke Sir Harry Moore, were ecstatic at the launch's success.

Out of the earth's atmosphere, Zhanshen 6 headed for the Moon so that Mission Commander Archduke  Sir Harry Moore could become the first human since 1972 to walk on the Moon's surface.  "One small step for a Wuxi Expat.  One great leap for the Wuxi China Expatdom!" said Moore as he climbed down from the Martian Rover and touched the lunar soil.  Moore then teed up a golf ball, brought out his trusty driver given to him by his good friend Bing Crosby, and drove the ball about 450 km.  He then got  back on the Martian Rover and returned to the Zhanshen 6 Module orbitting the moon so he and his crew could continue on their way to Mars.

2 comments:

  1. Ohh, those cool, brave Wuxi Expat-men; they must have stupendous courage!

    But, could a space/physics/science-type person explain two things, please?

    First, what will the Zhanshen Crew do when they
    encounter one of those Soviet dogs in space? I mean, what about if the Soviet dog lifts it's leg, on the side of the capsule?

    And, how do those WCE Commanders go the WC, in zero-gravity? That'd fly in the face of Newtonian physics, wouldn't it?


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  2. Herr Prof. Werner Von KlempererAugust 18, 2012 at 5:52 AM

    Pierce Double, nein, nein, - dummkopf!

    You will pay attention as I explain :-

    The Zhanshen 6 Expatronauts will, on their present trajectory, encounter the Soviet dogs. But no, those Pavlov's dogs will not
    use the WCE spaceship for their bodily-fluid emissions.

    Because, the Expat-men crew will hear those dogs barking, first.
    And then, they will use their silent dog-whistles to keep the baying dogs at-bay. This is due to the speed of sound-waves in outer space,
    according to Heineken's Law.






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