Not even going all out, the Wuxi China Expatdom celebration of Saint Patrick's Day 2012 will be the most massive celebration of the holiday in all of human history. Every Wuxi China Expatdomite from factory manager and pub owner to the the lowliest English teacher is doing his or her part to celebrate the holiday with the green and violence theme.
Wuxi Naturists are painting themselves green all over.
Wuxi Expat admirers of Mitt Romney's hair are dyeing their "Mitt Dos" neon green.
Duston Short and the members of the "Occupy Toilet" movement are drinking green toilet water.
Competitors in the Wuxi China Expatdom Bikini Classic are wearing green bikinis.
The Chestnut Pub will be serving a special cocktail made with Taihu Lake Water that can turn a person's skin green for 24 hours. Chestnut Pub owner Wally Droop poo-pooed allegations that the cocktail may carcinogenic. Droop's recently opened second pub, the Walnut, will sell the same cocktail at a higher price.
Canadian Wuxi Expats will play hockey during which a bench-clearing donnybrook should break out.
Combatants in Wuxi China Expatdom Civil War 2012 will be issued with neon green rifles and hand grenades.
One hundred million Wuxi Expats will gather at the three Harry Moore Memorial Squares and invent a new dance called the Prisyadka Kung Fu Fighting Dance.
Irish Wuxi Expats will try to pick fights with British Wuxi Expats.
Long-time Wuxi Expat Andis Kaulins, the English Teacher who is not to be confused with the Andis Kaulins who is the president of the Wuxi Expat Rifle Association and the Andis Kaulins who is the President of the Wuxi China Expatdom Elite Expat Association, told the WCE Blog that he would wear a dark green sweater to mark the day.
Archduke Harry Moore told the WCE Blog that he would dress in impeccably tailored green blazer and green slacks that would be finished off with a perfectly tied green cravat and green fedora, like his fashion hero Fred O'staire
The WCE Blog also learned that Prime Minister Mango would be wearing a bright green halter dresses with a nipped waist and flowing, knee-length skirt. The PM's wife Wonder Woman was, for just one day, donning green instead of her traditional Red, White and Blue suit.
His Majesty, the King of the Wuxi Expatdom, Gorzo the Mighty, told the WCE Blog that, as always, he was super-impressed by what his subjects were doing to celebrate a holiday.
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