Wally Droop owner of the Chestnut, Walnut, and Pink Kitty Pubs has become a figure of great prominence in the Wuxi China Expatdom.
His success as a businessman has earned him a position in the Wuxi China Expatdom Cabinet where he is the Minister of the Liquor Cabinet, and a seat on the Wuxi China Expatdom Defense Council where pub owners form the sixth branch of the WCE military along with its army, air force, navy, marine corp, and buffet reconnaissance force.
He is a familiar sight to even the tee-totaling Wuxi Expat who doesn't frequent Pubs and Clubs. Droop's flamboyant style of dressing, incorporating such diverse influences as Dame Edna, early 1970s Elton John, David Bowie in his Ziggy Stardust phase, Louis XIV during his Sun King phase, and comedienne Phyllis Diller make him a hard sight not to notice when he walks down the streets of the Wuxi China Expatdom.
The WCE Blog talked to Droop one afternoon at Droop's pub in the Nanchang Jie Bar Street: The Pink Kitty. The PK, as the locals call it, is Droop's contribution to the WCE's thriving alternative counter-culture. Droop; despite being dressed in a pink powder wig, strapless orange night gown, yellow knee-high stockings, and eight inch high teal blue platform boots; strode his pub with the authority of a Sergeant Major and his workers were clearly intimidated.
Droop, a no-nonsense man who claims to not be one to tolerate fools gladly, answered the WCE Blog's interviewer's questions with short, terse, and concise answers:
WD: After failing to start pubs in Moldavia, Serbia, Albania, Belarus, Northern Saskatchewan, and Chad -- I decided China was the land of opportunity. A friend of mine: Fred Minkleman brought me out here, and for a while he and I were partners, gay as can be, striding and traipsing the streets of Wuxi, all the while hugging the locals.
WCE: Can you tell me about the role of the Pub Owner in the Wuxi China Expatdom? Why do they have such high status? You would never see, for instance, a pub owner in the Canadian Cabinet or on the Joint Chiefs of Staff in the USA.
WD: Pub Owners were the original pioneers of the Wuxi China Expatdom. Unlike places that needed to be settled from scratch like Canada and Australia, way back when, the Wuxi China Expatdom was blessed with the infrastructure of thousands of years of Chinese civilization. As soon as there were pubs in Wuxi, the Wuxi China Expatdom was fully established. So unlike other places were needed the military or train builders to get going, the WCE was set up by Pub Owners.
WCE: How do you keep your legs looking so good?
WD: I don't own a car. I don't take buses. If the distance to a place is less than 10 km, I walk there.
WCE: Why you insist on fondling your male customers? Are you a sort who has....ah.....unnatural thingie-wingies?
WD: I don't insist on this. My customers do. My sexual habits, if I wasn't a pub owner, would be like those of Archduke Harry Moore or Pope Benedict XVI.
WCE: You and Fred Minkleman had a falling out. Could you tell us your side of the story?
WD: We had irreconcilable artistic differences that come from the fact that I was an ardent Nudist and he was an ardent Naturist. This all came out in the open when we had a vehement disagreement on the style of wood paneling we were to use for the entrance door to a cafe we were trying to set up.
WCE: They say you mistreat your employees. Is this true?
WD: Who told you that? Do you have their names?
WCE: What is your favorite book?
WD: I don't read.
WCE: Is it true you resent not having been asked to be part of the Shenzhan Six Mission to Mars?
WD: His Majesty, the King of the Wuxi China Expatdom, Gorzo the Mighty has promised me that I will be the commander of the Wuxi China Expatdom Mission to Uranus. So, I have gotten over it.
WCE: What advice do you have to those who want to live in the Wuxi China Expatdom?
WD: Stay away from the blogger Wussie Andrew.
WCE: What is the WCE accomplishment that you are most proud of?
WD: As a devotee of all things counter-culture, I can't be prouder of the night when the patrons counted to 1,345 before falling on the floor drunk. Gambay's patrons, I understand, once counted to 969!
WCE: Which Nationalities do you hate the most?
WD: I hate the Americans and the Brits and the French and the Canadians and.... How about asking me what nationalities I like?..... Actually, don't ask me!
WCE: They say you don't like Chinese things. So why are you here?
WD: Who said that? Do you have their names? Anyway, nothing could be further from the truth. I love the Chinese. I love to hug them and pat them on the head. Some of my best friends are Chinese, I'll have you know. Of course, I don't like any of their food or their driving.
WCE: Thanks for you time.
WD: No worries.
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