Thursday, April 5, 2012

World Leaders praise and offer comments on raid on Wuxi Expat Pub


World Leaders have praised the Wuxi China Expatdom Police Force raid on the Walnut Pub DJ Booth, located in a bunker 3,000 meters below the earth's surface, that destroyed a huge stockpile of Hip Hop Music.

His Holiness Pope Benedict XVI praised the raid saying it was a victory for "human decency and taste."

Vice President Joe Biden of the United States said "the raid was very smart and that his administration was thinking that a similar kind of raid done by the U.S. in the next few months could propel Obama to a re-election!"

Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper said it was very clever of Officer McNulty to disguise his million man raiding force as Zulu Warriors.  "The Australian Pub owner Wally Droop was fooled by his greed into thinking he was going to set his pub's single night receipt record." said Harper.
 
German Chancellor Andrea Merkel said that Wally Droop, the Walnut Pub owner, should have listened to her when she told him that bunkers are not a good idea because the force commanded by Officer McNulty was extremely efficient.

Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard said that Officer McNulty was all man and that it wouldn't surprise her "if he had some Australian blood in him because he was certainly more manly than Canadians Duston Short and Andis Kaulins who didn't participate in the raid!"

For his part, Andis Kaulins, the English Teacher who is not to be confused with the Andis Kaulins who is the President of the Wuxi Expat Rifle Association and Andis Kaulins Esquire who is the President of the Wuxi China Expatdom Elite Expat Association, said the raid was probably the greatest thing to happen in human history since Harry Moore last survived an assassination attempt.

Wuxi China Expatdom Minister of Colonies Harry Moore, full of graciousness and smiling optimism, while stroking his virile locks of tousled dark hair out of his piercing blue eyes, said that he and his darling Mrs. Miss Moneypenny were really impressed by the raid.  "We received news of the raid's success while we were in our hot tub together.  I squeezed my rubber ducky three times before giving my dear wife a hearty kiss to celebrate.  Nothing pleases me more than to see others do wonderful things with massive crowds.  It puts the pressure off me!"

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