Fred Minkleman, now co-owner of Gambay's Pub in the 1912 Bar District of Wuxi China, said he didn't care what the world thought. Monday, he announced at packed press conference at the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion and Buffet Room of Gambay's Pub, that rumours of plans for he and his twin brother Gambay's Pub co-owner Frank Minkleman to marry, were true. He told stunned Wuxi China Expatdom media members, as well as shocked members of the Wuxi China Expatdom general public, that he and brother Frank were going to go to the Wuxi China Expatdom government building to get their wedding license.
Declared Minkleman, "I don't care what the world thinks. Sure, most of the world will say that our love is forbidden and unnatural. But I don't care. If pub goers find it objectionable, well, good luck drinking at our over-priced competition! These nabobs will miss out on our games night, quiz night, boxing night, stripper night, political discussion night, Rolling Stones Tuesday, The Who Fridays, as well as the Swedish Bikini Team Mud Wrestling Hour. If they are so close-minded as to not understand our love.... Well... The heck with them!"
Asked how they planned to marry when the Expatdom had no laws allowing Same-Sex Marriage, Fred Minkleman said that his twin-brother Frank was from Ontario, Canada, and so it would be easy to have Frank's brain declared an inanimate purpose for wedding license purposes.
The Wuxi China Expatdom is the only jurisdiction in the world to allow humans to marry inanimate objects.
"Frank's brain declared an inanimate purpose" - wahh!! Took me 5 minutes to get up off the floor, in hysterics, when I came to that line!!
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