Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President says he will speak to the WCEDVDAS on the evening of March 1.

Responding to cries and moans from Wuxi Expatdomites begging him to tell them what he was going to do about the WCEDVDAS booking conflict crisis, Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Harry Moore issued a press release saying he was looking forward to speaking to the WCEDVDAS on the evening of March 1.

The press release didn't resolve the issue since the two organizations that Moore is scheduled to speak tonight, the Wuxi China Expatdom DVD Appreciation Society and the Wuxi China Expatdom Dick Van Dyke Appreciation Society, both share the acronym WCEDVDAS. Long time Harry Moore watcher Andis Kaulins, not be confused with the English Teacher of the same name, or the Wuxi Expat Rifle Association President of the same name, said that either "President Moore was unaware there was a conflict or he was again displaying his calm, virile, sunny and optimistic manner under pressure for which he is famous!"

After the release of the ambiguous statement, millions of media men searched every nook and cranny of the Wuxi China Expatdom hoping to locate President Moore. He was eventually found by CNN at a local Kedi buying tea-leaf eggs and a Snickers bar. When asked about the booking conflict, Moore told CNN that the conflict was the fault of his secretary Miss Moneypenny. "That naughty secretary! Every time I spank her for this, she calls me "Tarzan", her "Big Mountain Lion" and "Harry dear", and you know, I just don't have the heart to spank her in a rough way! I just pat her gently! This afternoon, I will go round to her place -- I like to let her work at her place or mine -- and we will consult, passionately, I mean sternly and seriously, about how to resolve this conflict! She has suggested that I toss a coin! But I don't know where on my person I left my change. Thankfully, Miss Moneypenny says she will help me find it!"

The two WCEDVDAS organizations are both holding their grand convention tonight and both have Harry Moore scheduled as a Keynote Speaker. They have threatened to go to war if Moore speaks to the other organization. Thousands of tanks, amphibious aircraft carriers and infantry have been seen massing on both sides of Xueqian Road in Downtown Wuxi where the organizations are headquartered.

Wuxi Expat from Ontario, Canada doesn't go to work on February 29

Duston Short, English Teacher and the Wuxi China Expatdom Midget Sumo Wrestling Champion, didn't go to work on Wednesday, February 29.

"Wednesday, I normally go to work if I am not sick!" said Short, an Ontario Canada Expat who has a reputation for tardiness and absenteeism.  "But when I saw I was scheduled to work Wednesday, February 29th, I thought it must be a mistake because everyone knows there are only 28 days in February!  And so I stayed in my apartment!"

Officials at the school, where Short is currently employed, say they aren't buying Short's excuse this time and will fine him a day's pay.  Short said that he was ill because of this news and may take the rest of the week off to recover.

Clouds of War gathering in the Wuxi China Expatdom?

As far as the WCE Blog can determine, the March 1 Harry Moore booking conflict between the Wuxi China Expatdom Dick Van Dyke Appreciation Society and the Wuxi China Expatdom DVD Appreciation Society has not been resolved, and the Expatdom is rife with rumors that war between the two organizations which share the same acronym could break as early as March 2.

There have reports of heavy infantry and tank movements,  military aircraft flyovers and camouflaged amphibious aircraft carriers parked along Xueqian road where the two organizations both have offices.

In response to the rumors of a WCEDVDAS war, panicky Wuxi Expats have been stocking up on canned foods, DVDs and Tsingtao Beer.  As well, the Wuxi China Expatdom religious community has held prayer services for peace at the million churches, mosques, synagogues and temples in the Wuxi China Expatdom.  Wuxi Sexpats, in turn, have been extra active with Bar Girls and have set up a sanctuary for them which they say they will keep open whether there is a war or not.

The eyes of the Wuxi China Expatdom will be on Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Harry Moore the evening of March 1 when he is still scheduled to deliver a lecture to both WCEDVDAS grand conventions at 700 p.m.   Unfortunately, the conventions are being held in different parts of the Expatdom making it physically impossible fro President Moore to speak to both organizations at the same time.  By only speaking to one, Moore would offend the other of the WCEDVDAS groups and both of them would see it as a casus belli to attack the other WCEDVDAS.

Wuxi Expat wants to marry the Ling Shan Big Buddha

Henrietta Nabors, a Wuxi Expat from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada, wants to marry the Big Buddha at Lingshan near Wuxi, China.

Nabors said it was love at first sight when she laid his eyes on the Big Buddha.  "I came to Ling Shan expecting to fall into a tourist trap.  Instead I fell in love!  Despite what Let's Go says about the Ling Shan Big Buddha, I was instantly entranced!  I broke through security because Ihad to fondle, grope and caress all 100 meters of him from the top of his head to the bottom of lotus pedestal on which he stands."

Nabors told the WCE Blog that she had filed an application for a wedding license with the Wuxi China Expatdom Marriage Bureau.

Gabriel Conroy, spokesman for the WCE Marriage Bureau, says he may not be able to grant a wedding license to Nabors. "The Ling Shan Big Buddha belongs to the locals, is a religious shrine and we would be infringing on local sovereignty if we permitted Nabors to marry it." said Conroy in an exclusive interview with the WCE Blog.

Friends of Nabors say she has threatened suicide if she cannot marry her 88m tall Adonis.

The Wuxi China Expatdom is the only jurisdiction in the world to permit Human -- Inanimate Object marriage.

Wuxi China Expatdom opens world's biggest Martial Arts studio and theme park

A 10 million square meter Martial Arts studio and theme park has been opened in the Hui Shan District of the Wuxi China Expatdom. 

"Dragon's Martial Arts Park will have every possible thing to appeal to the serious Martial Arts practitioner looking for a challenge, the Martial Arts fanatic, or the casual fan interested in new experiences!" said owner Bruce Dragon in an exclusive interview with the WCE blog.  "We will have Martial Arts coaches, sages and trainers on call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 or 366 days a year, including Christmas and Spring Festival to cater to your martial arts training needs!  And there isn't a style of Martial Arts you can't learn at Dragon's!  We have the Northern and Southern Chinese styles like the northern fist (北拳) or the southern fist (南拳).  And you can learn the horse, bow, drop, and dragon stances, whether in the traditional or modern manner!"

"If you don't have time to study, we have professional Martial Arts mercenaries for hire whom you can spar with or whom you can enlist to help you settle your personal scores!   And we also have miles and miles of pristine bamboo forest for you to stage martial arts gang battles!"

"And If you are just a martial arts fan, you will need a week to explore all our exhibits and to have lots of yuan to buy our martial arts specialty products and services!    Every day we hold a world championship Martial Arts competition.  Our Marital Arts museum is the biggest museum in the world.  We have every Martial Arts movie ever made playing in our ten thousand screen multiplex cinema.  We have an authentic to-scale replica of Hong Kong 1972 where Bruce Lee lived.  We have one million authentic Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris look-a-likes for you to pose with and test your Kung-Fu skills.  Our library and database contains all ancient and current research and thought about Martial Arts!  We have on-site plastic surgeons who can make you look like Bruce Lee, Jackie Chen or Chuck Norris.  Our souvenir shop is as big as Ba Bai Ban!  And as a special treat, thanks to the our physicists, who are world experts in multi-verse theory, we have all the movies that Bruce Lee would have made if he hadn't died so young!"

On Dragon's Martial Arts Park grand opening night, Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Harry Moore delivered a special lecture about the films made in this universe and other parallel universes by Bruce Lee.  After the lecture, the audience began to dance a new dance:  the Kung Fu Prisyakda Hustle to the virtuoso musical renderings and vocalizings of Harry Callahan and the WCE Trio.

Originally from Seattle, Bruce Dragon studied philosophy and Martial Arts, spending lots of time in Hong Kong and Hollywood where he opened prestigious Martial Arts Studios catering to the stars.   When he conceived the idea for his enormous Martial Arts Park, he shocked many in the Martial Arts industry by choosing the Wuxi China Expatdom to be the park's site.  But  Dragon had no doubt in his mind that it was the right thing to do.  "There was Bruce Lee!  Then there is the Wuxi China Expatdom which has Gorzo the Mighty, Mango, Harry Callahan, Admiral Lloyd Bridges, General Colonel Sanders and Harry Moore -- that's Bruce Lee to the power of seven.  The Wuxi China Expatdom is the world capital of Martial Arts!!"

Expats from Ontario, Canada open a restaurant in Wuxi, China

Monday night, the Short Brothers: Duston and Justin who hail from Etobicoke, Ontario, Canada opened a new restaurant in the Meicun District of Wuxi, China.  

Rae's Restaurant, named after a former Ontario provincial premier, will eventually have a menu and utensils.  In the meanwhile the Short brothers told the WCE blog that they would encourage Wuxi Expats to take the forty five minute Number 19 Bus ride, from the Wuxi train station south square, out to Rae's and check out the Toronto Maple Leaf and Ottawa Senator hockey team memorabilia that they had on display.  "We also tables and chairs where you can sit!" added Duston Short.

Asked about the cuisine they would eventually serve the Short brothers said they would serve Etobicoke cuisine. "When we find a supplier we can trust, we will serve Kraft's Macaroni & Cheese Dinner, Rowntree Aero Chocolate Bars, Captain Crunch cereal for breakfast, Maxwell House instant chocolate flavored coffee and cola served in your choice of can or plastic bottle!"

"We also have a toilet you can sit down on!" said the Short brothers in unison.

Wuxi China Expatdom King sick of Europeans phoning him and asking for money

Gorzo the Mighty, King of the Wuxi China Expatdom, says he has to keep changing his phone number because European leaders and finance ministers, panicking about the Euro, won't leave him alone.

"They keep telling me that I am their only hope!" said the Monarch, eyes bloodshot from lack of sleep.  "I told them their crisis serves them right for thinking they were immune to the laws of economics and thinking they didn't have to work so hard and could just leach off the Americans!  I was willing to give the Greeks a loan, even a gift bail-out, but they weren't willing to change their lifestyles one iota!"

King Gorzo the Mighty said he now won't even consider giving them a loan with stringent conditions because the Eurocrats then went too far.  "When they couldn't reach me one night, because I changed my number, they began to phone my wife Ayira's number.  That was just unforgivable!"

Over 1,000 Chimpanzees to be let go in the Wuxi China Expatdom

Prefabricated's Prefabricated Wooden Homes announced that they will let its entire staff of 1,000 chimpanzees go.

Pete Prefabricated, long-time Wuxi Expat and owner of Prefabricated's Prefabricated Wooden Homes, said his decision to hire over 1,000 chimpanzees to work in a his Prefabricated Wooden Home factory in the Wuxi New District was a big mistake.  "I have always taken pride the in high quality and slightly lower prices of our products, but I wanted to do better.  I wanted our prices to be substantially lower!  The only way to do this, I thought, was to hire Chimpanzees who would work long hours for peanuts and bananas!  But I am afraid they work was of substandard quality and almost as bad as the work I had done when I hired some Ontario, Canada Expats for a month!"

Prefabricated told the WCE blog that each chimpanzee would get three month's supply of bananas for severance pay and a bus ride to the Wildlife Safari Park in the 1912 Bar District of Wuxi, China.

Wuxi China Expatdom Police Squad launches Operation Hephaestion 2

Officer McNulty, acting chief inspector of the Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Mounted Police, (the WCERMP) announced the launch of Operation Hephaestion 2 which will try to rid Wuxi China Expatdom speech of pretentious French phrases and words.  The first Operation Hephaestion had been a tremendous success in correcting the bad grammar of WCE English teachers.

McNulty announced at the operation's launch on the grounds of Richilieu's Castings, a French company with a plant in the Wuxi New District.  As he spoke from his podium set up on the plant's front lawn,  many moaning and beaten French engineers could be seen in the background, sprawled on the grounds, floating in the nearby canal, and strewn on nearby roofs and trees.  When it was pointed out to the McNulty that the beaten Frenchmen were speaking their native tongue, McNulty said to think of how they could only get Al Capone for tax evasion.  "Who doesn't deserve to sample my personal idiosyncratic and euiponderant brand of justice more than a Frenchman!" asserted McNulty.

McNulty then  told the assembled media that a million WCERMP officers would be involved in Operation Hephaestion 2 , and that he had also received commitments from the Wuxi China Expatdom Armed Forces for assistance in the crackdown on pretentious French words and phrases. Said McNulty: "Beside the million police officers, General Colonel Harlan Sanders of the WCE Land Force has pledged armor and artillery assistance: WCERAF Air Marshall Gregory Peck says his ten thousand bombers will be on the highest alert for as long as it takes us to rid the Expatdom of pretentious French speaking; and WCERN Admiral Lloyd Bridges has told me that if need be, we can use his aircraft carriers and that the 200m cannons of his battleships can easily rain down fire on anyone using pretentious French phraseology where ever they may be in the Expatdom!"

Officer McNulty told the WCE Blog that he was inspired by Harry Moore, the WCE's Minister of Colonies, who had set-out on a crusade to eradicate all French movies in the Wuxi China Expatdom.  "I agree with President Moore's contention that French movies have a bad influence on personal character of Wuxi Expats and on the beauty of standard English spoken correctly!"

Five year old Atlanta, Georgia boy wants to be a Wuxi Expat when he grows up

Five year old Bobby Tewilliger, a primary school student at Bethune Elementary School in Atlanta, Georgia, already knows what he wants to be when he grows up.  He wants to be a Wuxi Expat like his heroes Harry Moore, Lloyd Bridges, Harry Callahan, Gregory Peck, Colonel Harlan Sander, Mango and Gorzo the Mighty.

Tewilliger's home room teacher Miss Wilkinson says Tewilliger is already his own man and rules the Bethune Elementary playground.  "Bobby is a preternatural polymath.  He already runs a ten million dollar a year plumbing contracting business, written three novels, gotten five female students and four of his teachers pregnant, pitched a no-hitter for the Atlanta Braves baseball team,  discovered material that can be a super conductor at room temperature, and designed and manufactured an amphibious main battle tank that can be driven two miles under the ocean's surface.  When he walks the playground sporting a monocle, wearing a Gorzo the Mighty t-shirt, carrying a copy of the Poolside Harry Moore and performing the Prisyadka dance, the girls swoon and all the boys bend their head down reverentially in admiration!"

Tewilliger told the WCE Blog that before he heard about the Wuxi China Expatdom that he was just a run-of-the-mill toddler who liked to watch Dora the Explorer, pick his nose, scratch his bum and drink too much coca-cola.  "But when I  read and heard about Gorzo the Mighty, Archduke Harry Moore's many great accomplishments and his novel the Poolside Harry Moore, the revolution that brought down the Ayatollah of Mordor, the Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Navy commanded by Admiral Lloyd Bridges;  the music of Harry Callahan and the WCE Trio, and Wonder Woman; I realized that there was more to life and that a Wuxi Expat was what I had to be!" said Tewilliger, who says he is saying money from his plumbing contracting business to buy an airplane ticket to the WCE.

Wuxi China Expatdom Amphibious Aircraft Carrier WCERN Basil Rathbone breaks world land speed record

Saturday, at the Tianyi Salt Flats of Wuxi, China, a new world land speed was set.

With Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Navy Commander Admiral Lloyd Bridges at the helm, the WCERN Amphibious Aircraft Carrier Basil Rathbone achieved a land speed of 1500 km/h easily exceeding the previous land speed record of 1228 km/h set by the ThrustSSC Super Sonic Car in 1997.  

The record was surprising since on water, the 150,00 ton WCERN Basil Rathbone's top speed was 70 knots. 

For Admiral Bridges, the setting of the land speed record was sweet vindication.  "They thought I was nuts when I first proposed the building of amphibious aircraft carriers.  The critics scoffed and said that amphibious aircraft carriers were too cumbersome to ever travel overland.  They didn't understand just how revolutionary was my super sonic nuclear motor technology and the quantum friction-reducing metal which I placed on the WCERN Basil Rathbone's keel!"

After setting the land speed record, the crew of the WCERN Basil Rathbone could be seen Prisyadka dancing on the deck.  Archduke Harry Moore, one of the first to back Admiral Bridges amphibious aircraft carrier idea, was permitted to join the crew as they danced on the deck.  Admiral Bridges then made Archduke Moore an honorary WCERN Admiral and presented him with the keys to the ship.

Shock Expose': "Harry Moore Secretly Having Cybersex Tryst With French Gargoyle Sculpting!"

A team of investigative journalists has published startling revelations that Harry Moore has been having a clandestine and torrid Net romance with the sculpting of a French gargoyle.

The gargoyle's identity has not yet been disclosed, however it perches on the
Notre Dame de Paris, at a height of around 8,888 metres.

The journalists have learnt that Harry Moore's passions have been directed
at the sculpting process of the gargoyle.

Harry Moore isn't in a position to comment on these claims at present, however
the luscious gargoyle-sculpting has been more forthcoming. Asked if it had any comments to make, it responded: " ", but " ", and that "
".

Wuxi Expat wants to marry the Hongdou Building

Tex Schram a Wuxi Expat from the U.S.A., has fallen in love with Wuxi's Hongdou Building, and wants to marry it.

Schram, a businessman, says it was love at first sight for him when he first laid his eyes on the 814 foot tall building in 2011. "Since then, I have been able to fondle, kiss, grope and caress all her 48 floors and her 136,218 square meters of floor space. I have run my toes over her glass, steel and concrete. It is my dream to one day be able to straddle her 92 foot tall spire." said Schram.

Schram told the WCE Blog that he had filed an application for a wedding license with the Wuxi China Expatdom Marriage Bureau.

Gabriel Conroy, spokesman for the WCE Marriage Bureau, says he may not be able to grant a wedding license to Schram. "The Hongdou Building belongs to the locals, and we would be infringing on their sovereignty if we permitted Schram to marry it." said Conroy in an exclusive interview with the WCE Blog.

Schram is the second Wuxi Expat to have announced a desire to marry a Wuxi, China skyscraper. Earlier this week, Irishmen Michael Furey announced his plans to marry the Moresky 360 Building.

Drinking Associates of Schram say he has threatened suicide if he cannot marry his dear, dear Hongdou.

The Wuxi China Expatdom is the only jurisdiction in the world to permit Human -- Inanimate Object marriage.

Prisyadka Dancing Craze in the Wuxi China Expatdom claims its first victims

Thursday evening, twenty Wuxi Expats, from Ontario, Canada, were injured when they tried to perform the Prisyadka Dance, the traditional Russian squat kicking dance. Millions of Wuxi Expats had been performing the dance after it had been done in the celebrations that followed Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Harry Moore's lecture at Ford's Theater in Washington D.C.

Acting Chief Inspector of the Wuxi China Expatdom Officer McNulty provided details of what might have happened to a packed press conference held at the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion of Gambay's Pub in the 1912 Bar District of Wuxi, China. "To be honest," said McNulty, "we don't know what exactly the Ontario Expats were trying to do! Many of them had black eyes and broken noses from being kicked in the face. Many of them fell in the canal behind Dangle's Participle, so we suspect that they were trying to perform the dance on a pier with no fence. Two of them managed to get run over by car traffic. Three of them went to the bathroom, tried to do the dance there and so were clobbered by other patrons. A few of them accidently swallowed their monocles which they tried to wear as they performed the dance. Many of the others have to go get their monocles surgically removed from intimate parts of their bodies. And we don't think we will ever find out how Duston Short managed to swallow a football, four pairs of traditional Russian Prisyadka dancing slippers and his twin brother Justin's watch -- it may well be that these swallowings were unrelated to the dancing incident!"

McNulty then said that he would canvass the WCE parliament and ask them to make laws regulating Prisyadka Dancing and Monocle Wearing. "I think that one should have a license before attempting to Prisyadka dance and wear monocles at the same time!"

The newly-formed Wuxi China Expatdom Monocle Wearers Society (WCEMWS) and Wuxi China Expatdom Prisyadka Dancers Association (WCEPDA), after hearing McNulty's comments quickly issued a joint press release saying that regulation and laws were unnecessary. "Millions of Wuxi Expats have been able to enjoy Prisyadka Dancing and wear monocles without doing harm to anyone. Why should we let a stupid minority of Ontarians ruin it for everyone? This group of Ontarians previously got lost walking home, got all their heads stuck in cupboards, and had to be hospitalized because they drank Chestnut Pub toilet water. You cannot make laws against stupidity so why trample on the freedoms that Wuxi Expats currently enjoy by bringing in an evil centrally-concentrated bureaucratic infrastructure?"

Rain and Alcohol make Wuxi Expat think he is back in England

Monty Byng, an English English Teacher living in the Wuxi China Expatdom, thinks that he is back in England in a really big China town. "The skies are gloomy, the streets are wet, there are lots of Chinese takeaways and alas, I can't find my wellingtons. I must have left them down around my local pub! lamented Byng to the WCE Blog interviewer whom he then asked how the flight from Shanghai to his native Lincolnshire had been.

Byng's true local is Dangle's Participle, the pub for English Teachers, located on Wuxi China's Nanchang Jie Bar Street. Sammy Dangle, owner of Dangle's Participle, told the WCE Blog that Byng has been the Pub's best customer during the recent spell of rain and does seem to have lost some of his senses. "At closing time, I have to pick him up off the floor and put him in a cab! He insists that his mum is going to pick him up so there is so need, but we do know better!" said Dangle who denied he was taking advantage of Byng's alcoholism and then stated that Byng was never all there to begin with.

Thousands and Thousands of Prisyadka Dancers gather at Wuxi China Airport

Thousands of Prisyadka-dancing Expats converged on the Wuxi Airport in the Shuo Feng District of Wuxi, China to greet Archduke and President Harry Moore whose plane returned from a triumphal tour of Sarajevo and Washington D.C. 

The Prisyadka-dancing Expats formed three rings of humanity around the airport.  When Moore's plane landed, the Prisyadka-dancing Expats, from squat positions kicked their feet higher in the air than they had ever done before.

Moore, still dressed in the impeccably tailored blazer, slacks, perfectly tied cravat and fedora, that he wore at Ford's Theater, received loud applause when he appeared before the welcoming throngs.

The cheers turned to screams of adulation when after performing some of his Fred Astaire inspired dance moves, Moore threw off his fedora and blazer and began to dance the Prisyadka himself.

Moore and welcoming Expats then danced the Prisyadka all the night and all the way from Shuo Feng to the Nan Chang Temple Market where Moore has a small one thousand square meter apartment.  The staff employed, in the million vehicle motorcade that was to take him there,  were instead able to get off work early at full pay.

Wuxi Expat wants to marry the Moresky 360 Building

Michael Furey, a Wuxi Expat from Ireland, has fallen in love with Wuxi's Moresky 360 Building, and wants to marry it.

Furey, an English Teacher working at English Fungus School, says it was love at first sight for him when he first laid his eyes on the 209m tall building in 2010. "Since then, I have been able to fondle, kiss, grope and caress all her 48 floors. It is my dream to one day be able to straddle her 29m tall spire." said Furey.

Furey told the WCE Blog that he had filed an application for a wedding license with the Wuxi China Expatdom Marriage Bureau.

Gabriel Conroy, spokesman for the WCE Marriage Bureau, says he may not be able to grant a wedding license to Furey. "The Moresky 360 Building belongs to the locals, and we would be infringing on their sovereignty if we permitted Furey to marry it." said Conroy in an exclusive interview with the WCE Blog.

Drinking Mates of Furey say he has threatened suicide if he cannot marry his dear, dear Moresky.

The Wuxi China Expatdom is the only jurisdiction in the world to permit Human -- Inanimate Object marriage.

Prisyadka Dancing Craze Sweeps the Wuxi China Expatdom

Thursday, Wuxi China locals, with bemusement, looked upon a group of lense-less Monocled Wuxi Expats, arm-in-arm doing a Prisyadka Dance at People's Square near Qingyang Road.  Prisyadka dancing is a traditional Russian dance where dancers kick upwards from a squat position.

The Dance craze came to Wuxi as a result of Russians doing the dance during celebrations that took after Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Harry Moore's lecture, delivered at Ford's Theater in Washington D.C., about cinematic depictions of the U.S. Civil War.  Gambay's Pub in the 1912 Bar District of Wuxi, China has set up a special Prisyadka Dance Room.  Already, Wuxi Expats have formed a Prisyadka arm-in-arm dance line spanning one end of Nanchang Jie Bar Street to the other.

Observers of WCEFAS President Harry Moore's lectures speculate that the Prisyadka Dance could replace the conga lines which have been the traditional method of celebrating Moore's orations.

Moore's lectures have resulted in conga lines, millions of people and miles long.  Wuxi China Expats now hope to break the world record for the widest arm-in-arm Prisyadka group dance which is 3,789 set after a speech by Boris Yeltsin to the Russian Duma in the 1990s.  Prime Minister of the Wuxi China Expatdom, Mango thinks that Wuxi Expats can easily reach the one million Prisyadka participant width in the next few weeks.

Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President's speech and dance performance converts potential assassins into fans.

Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society (WCEFAS) President Harry Moore wasn't preaching to the converted when he stepped up to the podium to deliver a lecture about Cinematic depictions of the U.S. Civil War, after the opening-night screening of the film My American Cousin at the Ford's Theater in Washington, D.C., U.S.A.

In fact, as Moore sat in the Presidential Box of Ford's Theater watching the film, thousands of members of the John Wilkes Booth Wing of the Quentin Tarantino faction of the WCEFAS, who had bought all the tickets for the screening and as well, had infiltrated the Theater's entire staff, all fired Philadelphia Derringer Pistols, many modified to fire automatic rounds of considerable caliber, at Moore.

All the shots missed, and Moore's divine locks of dark, virile hair weren't disheveled in the least. The assassins resumed watching the film and readied for their next move, which was to attack President Moore with daggers as he delivered his after-film lecture.

But their plans were thwarted by Moore's impeccable manner of dress, and his god-given oratory and dancing skills. Before Moore made his speech, his golden smile which reflected a sunny Reagan-like optimism, and his dress featuring impeccably tailored blazer and slacks that were finished off with a perfectly tied cravat and fedora, made even the most hard-boiled of the assassins look at him with open-mouthed admiration. When he spoke, the would-be assassins went into raptures because of the sweet sound of his oratory, and dropped their daggers. And when Moore began to accompany his oratory with the up-to-date and graceful dance moves of Fred Astaire, the assassins became fans. At the conclusion of Moore's speech, the crowd, which had only an hour earlier wanted to see him dead, formed a conga line of celebration and danced for hours.

Russians, who were part of the assassination plot, introduced a new element into the post Harry Moore Speech celebration. Hundreds of them, arm-in-arm, performed the Prisyadka, the famous Russian squat-kick dance. Not since the time of Peter the Great, had so many of them done the Prisyadka at the same time.

WCEFAS President Moore will return to the Wuxi China Expatdom where he has to sort out a booking conflict with the two WCEDVDAS organizations. The two organizations with the same acronym have threatened to go to war because of it.

Wuxi China Expatdom DVD Appreciation Society says Nuclear Programme built for peaceful purposes

Spokesman for the Wuxi China Expatdom DVD Appreciation Society, Mahmoud Safari said that their nuclear programme was for peaceful purposes and  that allegations, made by the Wuxi China Expatdom Dick Van Dyke Appreciation Society, that they were building Nuclear Weapons were "utterly false."  They further asserted that the right to nuclear energy was their undisputable right and that the Wuxi China Expatdom Dick Van Dyke Appreciation Society had better not use lies, political pressure or military pressure to stop them from their lawful right.

Asked why an organization that meet bi-weekly to discuss DVDs should have a nuclear programme, Safari said the energy needs of the Wuxi China Expatdom Dick Van Dyke were more than what the uninitiated might be lead to expect.

Asked about rhetoric coming from certain quarters of the Wuxi China Expatdom DVD Appreciation Society that they should destroy the Dick Van Dykers; that the Wuxi China Expatdom Dick Van Dyke Appreciation Society should be wiped off the map; that the false WCEDVDAS should be wiped from the page of time; and that the Dick Van Dykers were Germs; Safari said that rhetoric was hyperbolic and nothing more.  "Given the tension," added Safari, "that exists between us, the pure and the good WCEDVDAS, and the other WCEDVDAS which eats babies, tries to steal our Harry Moore Appearance, worships the Devil and the former King of Wuxi, and wants to enslave us and assault our daughters in beastly fashion, our fine and decent members can be forgiven for a itsy-bitsy tiny modicum of intemperate talk!"

Tension between the two appreciation societies, which share the same acronym: WCEDVDAS, has been at a critical level since it was discovered that a booking conflict existed where Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Harry Moore was scheduled to speak at both of their grand conventions at the same time and date.

U.S. announces 6.4 billion dollar arms deal with Wuxi China Expatdom Dick Van Dyke Appreciation Society

The Obama administration unveiled a $6.4 billion arms deal with the Wuxi China Expatdom Dick Van Dyke Appreciation Society on Tuesday -- including about $2.85 billion in missiles.

The sale includes 60 Black Hawk helicopters (totaling $3.1 billion), 114 advanced Patriot air defense missiles; a pair of Osprey mine-hunting ships; and dozens of advanced communications systems.

The Wuxi China Expatdom DVD Appreciation Society has complained to the United States about the sale of Patriot missiles and other weapons to the Wuxi China Expatdom Dick Van Dyke Appreciation Society, which it says is simply an appreciation organization that shouldn't have any military aspirations.

Spokesmen for the Dick Van Dyke Appreciation Society,for their part, say they have the right of self-defense and to assert their rights just like any other free individuals, organizations or nations.

Tensions between the two Wuxi China Expatdom Appreciation Societies, which share the same acronym :  WCEDVDAS, have increased since both groups booked Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Harry Moore to speak at their grand conventions at the same time and date resulting in what seems to be a conflict that could lead to bloodshed.

Wuxi China Expatdom Archduke doesn't wear Monocles -- prefers to bear himself with the aristocratic elegance and grace of Fred Astaire

Wuxi China Expatdom Archduke Harry Moore says he will have nothing to do with what he has labelled as the imbecilic fashion of wearing lense-less monocles.  

"Everything, we wear, including accessories should have an ostensible purpose.  I think it is rather daft to wear a monocle with no lenses!" said Moore, as he was dressed, in impeccably tailored blazer and slacks that were finished off with a perfectly tied cravat and fedora, for his appearance at the premiere of the film My American Cousin at Ford's Theater in Washington D.C.

Asked who his fashion icon was, the Archduke said Fred Astaire.  "Astaire dressed like a man should dress.  He was he epitome of sartorial style!  The perfect aristocrat.  You never had the impression he was trying to lord it over on others.  He was the guy next door, except he had grace coming out of every single pore and crevice of his body!"

Many Wuxi Expats are now wearing Lense-less Monocles

Not to be undone by the young local females who are wearing lense-less eye glass frames to make their eyes appear bigger, many Wuxi Expats are wearing lense-less monocles in hopes of gaining respect from the locals, all of whom are said to respect age.

"I hated it when locals told me I acted like a 25 year old!" says English Teacher Andis Kaulins (not be confused with President Andis Kaulins of the Wuxi Expat Rifle Association and the other Andis Kaulins who is the president of the Wuxi China Expatdom Elite Expat Association) who is 48 years old.  "Now, wearing my monocle in class, the students treat me like a senior.  No more, do any of them say I under thirty!"

The only complaint ET Kaulins has about wearing a monocle is that always falls into the ground when he runs to catch a bus.

The Midget Sumo Wrestling Champion of the Wuxi China Expatdom, Duston Short is wearing a monocle and a top hat as well.  "I have fooled many locals into thinking I am a millionaire because with my short squat frame, top hat and monocles, I look like an old-fashioned capitalist!"

More well-heeled Wuxi Expats are wearing golden pocket watches chained to their pockets to accompany the top hat and monocle.  Niels Bohr says that he has had three piece-suits custom-made for him on Houxixi street to complete his monocled look.

German Expat Baron Von Richter Smichter Merkel Strum says he is happy to see monocles back in fashion.  "All de little local young strudel really likes me now!"

Wuxi China Expatdom Monocle Manufacturers say orders for monocles more than they have the capacity to handle.  Warren Allyoucaneat, president of the Wuxi China Expatdom Monocle Company, says his company is planning to build a ten kilometer square monocle manufacturing facility to keep up with the demand.

Personal Trainer offers services to Wuxi Expats

Vince George S. Patton Lombardi, Personal Trainer, has come to the Wuxi China Expatdom.  

"Whether you need to raise your self-esteem, i.e. become a man; improve your performance at work, i.e stop screwing the dog; improve your golf swing; control your temper -- although if you are righteous, I don't see the need; improve your posture; succeed in business or warfare; or perform better in the sack, i.e. keep your wife happy; VGSPL Personal Trainer Services is the only self-improvement service you will ever need!  Think of VGSPL as your personal boutique sergeant-major.  You will learn to hate us but you will love the results!"  said Lombardi, who added that VGSPL's approach to personal-training was old-school.

Asked if he saw potential in the Wuxi China Expatdom, which by any standards, was the greatest jurisdiction in human history for economic, intellectual, scientific, spiritual, sporting, philosophical and artistic achievement, Lombardi said that the achievements of the WCE could be attributed to a very small elite minority.  "Of course this group; consisting of Gorzo the Mighty, Alfred Lord McClusky, Harry Callahan, Harry Moore, Lloyd Bridges, Gregory Peck, Mango, Ayira: the Chosen One, the sportsmen Rabbis and Colonel Harlan Sanders; is the greatest collection of humanity ever, but that doesn't mean there is no room for self-improvement among the rest of the Wuxi Expats.  I understand that there are in the WCE, groups of Expats from Ontario, Canada;  as well as English teachers and Sexpats who could all use a good and swift kick in the ass!"  said Lombardi.

Lombardi praised the Wuxi China Expatdom, saying it was enlightened in that it saw the wisdom of things from the past that are currently considered unenlightened.  "In the Wuxi China Expatdom, they are free to paddle and righteously punish those who are lazy and immoral.  And I can practice my favorite training technique which is to make my clients dig a hole as fast as they can, or else have a super-tank run them over.  That teaches concentration of the mind like nothing else!  And when we have our to-the-death gladiator competitions before graduation, there is none of this not-keeping-score baloney!"

VGPSL will open its training center at the corner of Xueqian and Zhonghan Roads on February 21.

World Leaders express concern over Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President's Double-Booking

Leaders, the world over, whether democratically elected or dictators, have expressed concern over Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Harry Moore's double-booking conflict.  The WCEFAS President had been booked to be speak at two WCEDVDAS conventions at seven p.m. on March 1.  The booking conflict occurred because the two organizations, the Wuxi China Expatdom Dick Van Dyke Appreciation Society and the Wuxi China Expatdom DVD Appreciation Society share the same acronym.  World Leaders have offered President Moore varying advice about what to do.

Kim Jung Un, North Korea leader, issued a declaration stating that President Moore should address the Wuxi China Expatdom Dick Van Dyke Appreciation Society Convention.  Un said his father, the great leader King Jung Il, loved nothing more, than when he wasn't doing his dictatoring job, to throw up his feet and watch episodes of the Dick Van Dyke Show.

U.S. President Obama blamed the double-booking conflict on the Bush Administration.  He said that the solution was for everyone to work together under the auspices of centrally-bureaucratized government to find common ground.  "What folks need and want is for everyone to move beyond their differences and work together.  This calls for political leadership with vision.  Everyone can't just avoid paying taxes.  They must paid their fair share!  I will not rest until some solution satisfying to everyone is found by me!" said Obama.

U.S. Vice President Joe Biden said that President Moore should just go to both conventions at the same time.  Asked if he was more of a DVD fancier or a Dick Van Dyke fan, Biden said he liked watching t.v. on Betamax.

Iranian leader Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said that President Moore should address the WCEDVDAS that had less Jews in it.

Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard said she wished President Moore would cancel both speaking engagements and come over to her place that evening.

Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper said that President Moore should toss a coin.

Pope Benedict XVI said President Moore should pray for guidance.

The minority leader of the U.S. House of Representatives, Nancy Pelosi, also expressed a desire that President Moore cancel both engagements and come over to her place that evening.

Hugo Chavez, dictator of Venezuela, said President Moore should address the WCEDVDAS that had less Americans in it.

WCEFAS President Moore, who is in Washington D.C. to attend a film premiere at Ford's Theater, was unavailable for comment.

Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Double-Booked

When he returns, hopefully alive, from his visit to Ford's Theater in Washington D.C., Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Harry Moore will have a booking conflict to deal with.

President Moore had agreed to deliver to a lecture on film to the WCEDVDAS.  Unfortunately, he wasn't aware that there two organizations in the Wuxi China Expatdom sharing the acronyms WCEDVDAS:  The Wuxi China Expatdom Dick Van Dyke Appreciation Society and the The Wuxi China Expatdom DVD Appreciation Society.  Both of these organizations sent letters to the WCEFAS head office requesting President Moore deliver keynote speeches to their grand convention on March 1 at seven p.m.  

President Moore, for his part, said he thought it was funny, at the time, that his secretary Miss Moneypenny confirmed with him twice that he agreed to make a speech to the WCEDVDAS at the specified date and time.  But he then forgot about it.

The conflict wasn't noticed till it was pointed out that there were two advertising campaigns, costing over a billion dollars each, proclaiming President Moore's scheduled appearance at the same time, but at different places.

For all members of both these organizations listening to a live speech by President Moore would be the greatest moments of their lives, and so many of them spent their life-savings to be present at the specified date and time before the conflict was discovered.

President Moore blamed the conflict on Miss Moneypenny and told the WCE Blog that he would spank his secretary when he arrived back at the WCE.  

When asked what he would do about the conflict, President Moore said he was stumped because he really didn't want to disappoint anyone.  He also expressed a wish that the conspiracy theory saying there were several Harry Moores in the WCE was true.

Members of the two organizations said that President Moore was a saint among men, and so open warfare between the two WCEDVDAS's was probably going to be the only way to resolve the conflict.

Acting Chief Inspector of the Wuxi China Expatdom Police Squad raises questions about Mexicans

Officer McNulty, acting Chief Inspector of the Wuxi China Expatdom Police Squad expressed concern to the WCE Blog about talk of Mexicans in the Wuxi China Expatdom.

Officer McNulty said that he was all for actual Mexicans being in the WCE and that some of his best friends were actual Mexicans.  He however wished that actual Wuxi Mexpats wore badges saying they were Mexicans so as not to become victims of police brutality meant for English Teachers with bad grammar.

Officer McNulty said his chief concern with the talk of actual Mexicans in the WCE was with the use of the word actual.  "If there are actual Mexicans in the WCE, that must mean that are fake or faux Mexpats in the WCE.  Now, I say again, I am all for actual anythings of any race, nationality, or religion living in the WCE; but if I catch someone pretending to be a nationality he is not, I will be forced to give him the benefit of my idiosyncratic form of divine equiponderant justice!  I hate fakery and fauxishness!"

Officer McNulty concluded the interview by apologizing to Archduke Harry Moore for using a French word in the interview.  "Pretentious of me!  I know!  Forgive me Harry!" said McNulty.

Bombs thrown and Guns fired at Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President's motorcade in Sarajevo

Despite several assassination attempts, Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Harry Moore's visit to the Sarajevo Bosnia and Herzegovina Expatdom Colony was considered an astounding success.

President Moore, who is a Wuxi China Expatdom Archduke, toured the SB&H Expatdom alongside his host Sophie, Duchess of Hohenberg, in a Gräf & Stift open sports car, with its top folded down.   Sometimes during the tour, several bombs of various explosive capabilities, from old-fashioned hand-held to atomic weapons, were directed toward the Gräf & Stift open sports car.  President Moore was able to ward off the many projectiles and bombs, directed his way, with graceful ease.  "You going to have a hard time throwing bombs at a man whose classmates in Kung Fu and Jujitsu School included our current Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Navy Commander Lloyd Bridges, Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Land Forces Commander General Colonel Sanders, Chuck Norris, Pierce Broslund, George S. Patton, Bruce Lee, Steve McQueen and Jackie Chen!" declared President Moore, who had already appeared to have forgotten the incident when asked about it.

Afterwards, WCEFAS President Harry Moore's film talk about the Cinema and World War One, held at the Sarajevo Bosnia and Herzegovina Expatdom Colony Town Hall was received with much adulation  The ten million who attended the speech afterwards celebrated by forming the longest conga party line in European history, or at least since the Diet of Worms. 

After the speech, the motorcade got lost on the way to the airport.  Making a left turn instead of a right turn, the motorcade drove right past Schiller's delicatessen where a meeting of the Gavrilo Princip wing of the Quentin Tarantino faction of the Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society was just breaking up.  The driver, when realizing the mistake, popped the clutch.  Seeing President Moore in the stalled Gräf & Stift open sports car, all four hundred of the Principates pulled our their 9x17mm pistols and fired at Moore, but thankfully missed.  They did however mess the WCEFAS President's hair causing the U.N. General Assembly to hold an emergency meeting to express its concern.

President Moore was eventually able to make it to the airport to catch his flight to Washington D.C. where he is scheduled to attend the first screening of the film My American Cousin at Ford's Theatre.  Worries have been raised about another assassination attempt on President Moore when he goes to the Ford Theater.  It was there in 1865 that John Wilkes Booth assassinated President Lincoln.  Many have expressed concern that Moore would attend the screening sponsored by the John Wilkes Booth Wing of the Quentin Tarantino Faction of the Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society.

There are actual Mexicans in the Wuxi China Expatdom!

John Diefenbaker, Wuxi Expat English teacher, was surprised to learn that there were actual Mexicans living in the Wuxi China Expatdom.

When told so but a fellow English teacher who said he had lots of Mexpat friends in Wuxi, Diefenbaker asked what they did.  He was told that they did this and that.

President of the Wuxi China Expatdom Actual Mexican Expats Association, Manuel Gonzalez, when hearing of Diefenbaker's questions, was compelled to have a press conference at the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion of the Gambay's Pub in the 1912 Bar District.  Said  WCEAMEA Presidente Gonzalez "Si!  Senor Diefenbaker!  There are many of us Mexpats in the Wuxi China Expatdom!  And we don't need no stinking badges to indicate to others that we are proud Mexpatians!  When you see a man wearing an sombrero asleep at Li Hu Park, you know you are seeing a Mexpat!"

Wuxi China Expatdom's Minister Of Colonies Bans French Cinema Smut

Harry Moore, the WCE's Minister of Colonies, has set-out on a crusade
to eradicate all French movies. He said that his campaign would only take-place in the Expatdom's colonies. "I've no jurisdiction here in the Wuxi China Expatdom as regards what Expats want to watch at the cinema, but there'll be no more French
movies allowed in the Colonies".

"Let me make it clear though", he said, "I've got nothing against the French as-such. They are probably good people. But they can't play cricket; their cars are ugly old clunkers; their food is inedible, and, as for their movies - it behooves me to call it 'cinema', 100% depravity!".

"Sir David Lean never resorted to cheap, disgusting screenplays. French movies are riddled with it. In the WCE's Colonies, I'm allowing a period of grace for Expats to hand-in any French dvds or videotapes. After that, there'll be no mercy!".

Harry Moore said that any film directed by Francois Truffaut will be at the top of his hate-list. "And", he continued, "the following so-called
actors are in my sights: - Bridgitte Bardot, Gerard Depardieu, Yves St Laurent,
and Alain Delon". "French movies on DVD will be boxed and shipped back to Paris".

Andis Kaulins, the English Teacher, expressed suprise at the ferocity of Harry Moore's anti-French wrath. "Whilst I agree in principle with the Minister of Colonies, I don't think that Maurice Chevalier is a corrupting influence on the youth of the Expatdom. Except that he couldn't sing properly".

"No, not much of a crooner", said Harry Moore, "I mean, what on earth
does 'sank 'eavens' mean anyway?".

One million Wuxi Expats get married on Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day 2012 in the Wuxi China Expatdom saw a record one million Wuxi Expats marry inanimate objects.  The Wuxi China Expatdom became the only jurisdiction in the world to permit humans to marry inanimate objects.  And given the fact that the Expatdom has increased dramatically in size because it has had many other jurisdictions become WCE colonies, it was only natural that Valentine's Day 2012 would see the Wuxi China Expatdom Wedding Chapel annex of Gambay's Pub in the 1912 Bar District swamped with humans wanting to marry their favorite things.

Frank Minkleman, manager of the Wuxi China Expatdom Wedding Chapel, said that the demands to be married on Valentine's Day became so overwhelming that the Chapel could only marry humans and small objects.  "Pens, Ipads, books fine!  Buildings, Tanks, Aircraft Carriers, and true-to-scale elephant statues were out of the question on V-day!" added Minkleman.

Many Wuxi Expats married their Ipads, Ipods, Iphones and Android smart phones.  But the most popular objects of matrimony for them on February14th were autographed copies of the Poolside Harry Moore Novel and Portfolio.  One Expat, conspiracy theorist author Jim Garrison married a copy of his book: The isn't just one Harry Moore

One million Wuxi Expats get married on Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day 2012 in the Wuxi China Expatdom saw a record one million Wuxi Expats marry inanimate objects.  The Wuxi China Expatdom became the only jurisdiction in the world to permit humans to marry inanimate objects.  And given the fact that the Expatdom has increased dramatically in size because it  had many other jurisdictions join it as WCE colonies, it was only natural that Valentine's Day 2012 would see the Wuxi China Expatdom Wedding Chapel annex of Gambay's Pub in the 1912 Bar District swamped with humans wanting to marry their favorite things.

Frank Minkleman, manager of the Wuxi China Expatdom Wedding Chapel, said that the demands to be married on Valentine's Day became so overwhelming that the Chapel could only marry humans and small objects.  "Pens, Ipads, books fine!  Buildings, Tanks, Aircraft Carriers, and true-to-scale elephant statues were out of the question on V-day!" added Minkleman.

Many Wuxi Expats married their Ipads, Ipods, Iphones and Android smart phones.  But the most popular objects of matrimony for them on February14th were autographed copies of the Poolside Harry Moore Novel and Portfolio.  One Expat, conspiracy theorist author Jim Garrison married a copy of his book: The isn't just one Harry Moore.

Sarajevo Bosnia & Herzegovina Expatdom is officially a colony of the Wuxi China Expatdom!

Europe, in the doldrums because of problems with its currency and its demographic decline, could turn it around now that it can boast it is part of the Wuxi China Expatdom!  

WCE Archduke Harry Moore officially conferred status on the SB&H Expatdom today in ceremony held at the Sarajevo Town Hall before a crowd of ten million SB&H Expats and locals.  In the ceremony, His Archdukeness presented the SB&H delegation that had come to the WCE to apply for colonial status, thousands of portraits of WCE King Gorzo the Mighty to place in all rooms in the SB&H Expatdom.  The SB&H colonial delegation then pretended to do a ceremonial kow-tow to the Archduke which the Archduke ceremonially and magnanimously refused.  The flag of the WCE Expatdom with the flag SB&H Expatdom directly beneath was then raised up a flagpole, after which the anthems of the WCE and the SB&H Expatdoms were sung.

The leader of the SB&H Expatdom, Valentine Clementine, told the WCE Blog that he was proud of his Expatdom becoming the first part of Europe to join, as a colony, the WCE.  "Just think!  The great European nations, and the weaker ones too, will have a way of getting out of the EU!  They can become WCE colonies as well!" said Clementine.  "Under the genius administration of the Minister of Wuxi China Expatdom Colonies, Archduke Harry Moore how could they go wrong?!?"

After the ceremony, Harry Moore took off his archduke and minister clothing, and assumed his role as the president of the Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President for his tour around Sarajevo.  "President" Moore and his host Sophie, Duchess of Hohenberg, then boarded a Gräf & Stift open sports car, with its top folded down.  The sports car will take Moore and his hostess, whom he described as "deliciously attractive," on a tour of the historical parts of Sarajevo

Wuxi China Expatdom Archduke's plane successfully lands at the Sarajevo Airport

For the second time, but in a different part of the world, airport authorities were forced to bring out the fire hoses and clear an overenthusiastic crowd off the tarmac in order to give landing space to a plane carrying Harry Moore, who among his many titles, is the Wuxi China Expatdom Minister of Colonies, the President of the Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society, an Archduke and adopted member of the Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Family, a two-time inductee into the Wuxi Expat Hall of Fame, a Super Bowl Champion team and a World Cup Soccer Championship team.

The airport, this time, was the Sarajevo International Airport , known to the locals as Medjunarodni Aerodrom Sarajevo, where Archduke Moore was making an royal visit to officially confer Wuxi China Expatdom colonial status on the Expatdom of Sarajevo Bosnia & Herzegovina.  An estimated 400 million SB&H locals and Expats came to the Airport to greet the Archduke.  The crowd unfortunately took up every inch of space in the Airport and were sitting on the landing strip in hopes of being run over by the plane carrying Moore.  Bob Butmir, manager of the Airport, told WCE Blogspot that the crowds thought Harry Moore had some kind of special power to land a plane on crowds without hurting them.  "Telling them that Harry Moore wasn't really a god, but just a better-than-average mortal man blessed with great oratorical  and administrative skills, as well as a resplendent virility, didn't change their minds!  So fire hoses, it had to be!"  said Butmir.

When Moore's plane finally landed and the Archduke was able to get off the plane, millions in the crowd fainted at the resplendence of his black locks of hair, his newly-grown curled-up mustache, and his sunny, optimistic smile. Moore made a short address to the crowd where he said he was reminded of the scene in one of The Naked Gun movies where the Leslie Nielson character spoke into a microphone and did a parody of the Renoir's film La Regle du Jeu.  "You must all be hear to see Wierd Al Yankovic and not little old me!" insisted the Archduke to the throng which responded with hundreds of millions of voices:  "Of course not!  We want you!  We want you!"

After finishing his speech, Moore and his host Sophie, Duchess of Hohenberg, boarded a Gräf & Stift open sports car, with its top folded down.  The sports car was part of the a three car motorcade which was take the Archduke to various ceremonies and on a tour of Sarajevo.

Wuxi Red Guards trounce the New York Giants in the Super Duper Bowl

The Wuxi Red Guards trounced the NFL Champion New York Giants 73-0 to win Super Duper Bowl 2 and claim the World Professional Football Championship.  A professional football record crowd of 200,000 watched the game at the newly-constructed Santiago Cafe Bowl Stadium on Nanchang Jie Bar Street in Wuxi, China.

The Record Crowd saw Red Guard Quarterback Rabbi Benjamin Blech, gave his throwing arm a rest  and continually hand off the ball to Running Back and Royal Triplet, Hayek the Mighty who rushed for 560 yards and eight touchdowns in his first game ever of professional football.  

Hayek could have scored ten touchdowns, but on two plays, that touched the hearts of professional football fans and mothers everywhere, Hayek, as he neared the goal line, lateraled the ball to his mother Wonder Woman allowing her to become the first female to score a touchdown in a professional football game.  "I was inspired to do this by my godfather Archduke Harry Moore and his mission to Paradise Island to impregnate all the women of child-bearing age there.  I asked myself, what I could do too, in such a selfless manner, to help womankind, and I thought what better way than to let my mother score a touchdown!"

But the real star of Super Duper Bowl 2 was Harry Callahan and the WCE Trio.  So good was their half-time musical performance, that instead of playing the fourth quarter of the football game, Super Duper Bowl officials let the band play an encore and allow Harry Callahan to have another wardrobe malfunction.  Said Callahan, who returned to Wuxi from a crime-fighting assignment in the Suzhou China Expatdom Colony:  "I wasn't planning on bearing my chest, but I didn't want to disappoint all the good people who were demanding it!"

Wuxi China Expatdom Minister of Colonies returns from Paradise Island

Wuxi China Expatdom Minister of Colonies Harry Moore's plane was eventually able to touch down at the Wuxi Airport in the Shuo Feng District, Saturday evening.  The Minister's plane's landing had been delayed by the millions of reporters who had the crowded the airport and sat on the tarmac in anticipation of his return from Paradise Island, home of WCE Prime Minister Mango's wife Wonder Woman, where Moore had gone on a mission to impregnate all its princesses of child-bearing age.  Fire hoses had to be sprayed on the tarmac-occupying pressmen to enable the landing to happen.

After Moore's plane touched down, the Minister de-boarded onto the tarmac and walked toward a microphone placed thereon.  He announced to the multitudes, listening to the radio or watching on television, that he was not happy and triumphant but miserable. He made his mission, he told the listening millions, for a woman, and she did not even show up at the airport.  Stunning the awaiting multitudes into silence because no one had ever seen the always sunny, optimistic and virile Moore seem unhappy, Moore then asked the audience if they remembered the opening scene from Jean Renoir's 1939 classic film La Regle du Jeu.  A few, who did, explained Moore's reference to the others and a great relief came over the millions at the Wuxi Airport.  The smarter ones in the press corp then began to laugh.

 Moore then told the massive crowd that he wanted to thank the ladies of Paradise Island for treating him so well.  "I came to the Island in a business-like state of mind and was expecting the girls to be too, but the fine ladies who I had to impregnate, made the couplings romantic and emotionally satisfying.  More than just catering to my every passionate desire, they had lots of my favorite foods and practically every movie ever made in their DVD collection.  So between my duty calls, I was able to watch Doctor Zhivago on a forty meter wide screen while eating a steak cooked to perfection.  So boy!  I had a lot of fun!  It was a trip full of the most pleasant sensations!"

Asked how good-looking the girls were, Moore said that he always believed that the photo of the girls in Playboy magazine were airbrushed, and that girls really didn't look like that.  "But on Paradise Island, none of the girls had blemishes and were all proportioned perfectly!  Heck, some were even been looking than Wonder Woman herself!" said the Minister.  "And to have such softness in one's arm was like eating some delicious melt-in-your-mouth chocolate or breaking lots of bubble wrap by rolling on it!"

A huge one million vehicle motorcade, featuring every car every made in human history, all the new super tanks of the Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Land Force, and the ten amphibious Air Craft Carriers of the Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Navy then took Minister Moore from Shuo Feng to the WCE Monarchical Palace.  Overhead, a hundred planes from the Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Air Force flying in tight formation accompanied the land vehicle parade.

 At the Palace, his Majesty, the King of the Wuxi China Expatdom Gorzo the Mighty presented Minister Moore with ten medals of honor for the duty he had just done for the Wuxi China Expatdom, and recommended that he be inducted into the Wuxi China Expat Hall of Fame for an unprecedented third time.  "No Man!" declared his Majesty, "has done so much for all of mankind!  I am sure that I speak for Wuxi China Expatdomites when I say I really admire Minister Moore's pluck and courage in agreeing to take on this difficult mission.  Lesser men would have been rendered too excited by the prospect of sleeping with all those beautiful girls, but Harry, and I call him that because I consider him my great friend, managed to keep his composure and sense of humor during this Herculean task we asked him to perform!"

Moore was then presented with a garland of flowers and declared the Wuxi Expat Man of the year  by the two co-chairwomen of the Wuxi China Expatdom Ladies Auxiliary and Voters League (WCELAVL):  her Majesty, the Queen of the Wuxi China Expatdom, Ayira: the Chosen One and the first lady of the Wuxi China Expatdom, Wonder Woman.  Speaking for both, Ayira, said that they would do everything they could to see to it that Minister Moore was presented with a Nobel Prize for Peace and Economics, a Pulitzer Prize, the highest honour an Australian could get in Australia, and a place on People's Magazine's list of most interesting people in 2012.  Wonder Woman added that it was going to be the greatest of honors to be the aunt  of children sired by Minister Moore.

 After the royal presentation ceremony, the massive motorcade took Minister Moore to Gambay's Pub in the 1912 Bar District of Wuxi where a crowd of 75,000 bar patrons feted Moore for five hours with choruses of "For he's a jolly good  fellow!" and "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang."  Then a ceremony took place where Minister Moore was also presented with an award for lifetime achievement by the President of the Pampers Corporation, Victor Mills, who said "Harry is the best thing to happen to the disposable diaper industry since the invention of disposable diapers!"

Afterwards, in the locker room of Gambay's, Minister Moore received congratulatory calls from many world leaders.  "Merkel, Sarkozy, Cameron, some guy named Barry Obambi, my buddy the Pope, the leader-for-life of Uzwetyourbedistan, and another guy named Stephen Harper, whoever he is, phoned!" said Moore.

The leaders of Russia and Japan sent ambassadors to Moore requesting his fecund powers to help turn around their demographic decline.  "I respectfully declined and told them I will only add more Wuxi China Expats to the world!" said the Minister.

But the most unprecedented honor for Minister Moore came from the National Football League and FIFA, the international governing body of soccer.  NFL Commissioner Rogel S Goodell gave Minister Moore the Vince Lombardi Trophy, normally awarded to the winning team in the Super Bowl.  Moments later, Moore received a phone call from FIFA President Seth Blater who awarded Minister Moore with the FIFA World Cup Trophy, normally awarded to the winner of the FIFA World Cup Tournament.  Sports Historians said it was unprecedented for a major sports organization to award its team championship trophy for individual achievement in a field of endeavor not related to their sport

Harry Moore will only be spending a few days in the WCE before he puts on his Archduke hat for a visit to the Sarajevo Bosnia & Herzegovina  where he will confer WCE Colonial Status on the SB&H Expatdom before going on a Motorcade tour on the latest WCE colony.

From the SB&H Expatdom, Archduke Moore will take off his royal hat, fly to Washington D.C.,  assume his role as the President of the Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society and give a film talk after the opening screening of the new film My American Cousin.

There are apparently three persons in the Wuxi China Expatdom named Andis Kaulins

Andis Kaulins, the English teacher who is not to be confused with the Andis Kaulins that is the President of the Wuxi Expat Rifle Association, has said that a third person named Andis Kaulins is now living in the Wuxi China Expatdom.

 

Said ET Kaulins, at a press conference held at the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion of Gambay's Pub in the 1912 Bar District of Wuxi, China: "I was walking down Zhongshan Road, minding my own business, when a very handsome foreign person walked up to me and introduced himself as Andis Kaulins!  I was taken aback!  When finally, I recovered my senses, all I could think to ask him was what he was doing in the WCE!  He told me that he had come to the WCE to become the president of the Wuxi China Expatdom Elite Expat Association (WCEEEA)"

 

Reporters hearing ET Kaulins's narrative then asked Andis Kaulins, the one not be confused with the President of the WCERA and the third Andis Kaulins, if the third Andis Kaulins didn't mean the Wuxi China Expatdom Eclectic Expat Association (WCEEEA) which is about to hold primary presidential elections in advance of its general presidential election which in turn will be held this fall.  ET Kaulins, who is not to be confused with the Andis Kaulins who is the president of the WCERA, said that the Andis Kaulins Number Three made a point of saying that he was the president of the WCE Elite EA, not to be confused with the WCE Eclectic EA.  "There are two WCEEEAs in the WCE!" declared the Andis Kaulins who was an English Teacher and not a president of anything.

Wuxi Expat has Eclectic Underwear Collection

Robert Knight, Wuxi Expat English Teacher, claims to have the most eclectic underwear collection in the Wuxi China Expatdom and all its colonies, including Bosnia and Herzegovina.

Knight, from Hamilton, Canada, says the eclecticism of his underwear collection comes from the fact that it is not in the least kinky, leopard-striped, sexpatish or femalish. "My underwear was either purchased at the Walmart on Upper James Street or the Mark's Work Wearhouse on Upper Wentworth in my hometown!" said Knight, with evident pride.

Asked how his underwear collection could be so eclectic, given that it seemed pedestrian and workmanlike, Knight said "We are talking about an Expatdom. Your average run-of-the-mill everyday Expat claims to have exotic tastes and habits. Now! I don't and that makes me an Eclectic Expat!"

Knight, says the eclecticism of his underwear collection combined with his experience in business and government would make him an ideal president of the Wuxi China Expatdom Eclectic Expat Association (WCEEEA). The WCEEEA will have a series of primary elections in the districts of the WCE before its hold its general presidential election in November 2012.

New York Giants to meet Wuxi Red Guards in Super Duper Bowl 2

With their 21-17 victory over the New England Patriots Sunday, the New York Giants won Super Bowl XLVI  and, much more importantly, earned a match-up with the China Expatdom Football League (CEFL) Champion Wuxi Red Guards in this Sunday's Super Duper Bowl 2 -- the championship of Galactic He-Man Football.   The Giants hope to avenge, for the NFL, the 63-20 thrashing that the Red Guards administered on the NFL Champion Green Bay Packers in last year's inaugural Super Duper Bowl.

Giant Quarterback Eli Manning said that while it "was nice" to win the Super Bowl, the Giants season would be a failure if they couldn't at least put up a respectable showing against the mighty Red Guards of the Wuxi China Expatdom.  "To be honest, we are simply not in the same class as the Wuxi Red Guards.  We are like children and they are men of great character!  I mean, it was mighty magnanimous  of their Quarterback, Rabbi Benjamin Blech, to say that the Super Bowl Champions could compete with the weaker teams in the CEFL!" declared Manning after receiving the Vince Lombardi Trophy during the Super Bowl XLVI post-game ceremony.

Red Guard Wide Receiver Rabbi Yonason Goldson said he woke up early to watch the Super Bowl Monday morning, but admitted he was so distracted by household cleaning duties that he missed the Super Bowl's dramatic finish and so wasn't aware who the Super Bowl Champions were.  "You know!  I feel sorry for the Super Bowl Champions, whoever they may be!  I hope we don't have to pretend that they can be competitive with us.  I understand that some of those guys make a career of playing American Football.  I hate to shatter their rice bowls!" said Rabbi Goldson.

Asked if he wanted to know who won the Super Bowl, Rabbi Goldson said he didn't.  "I want to keep the identity of our opponent a surprise till game time next Sunday" laughed Goldson who quickly put on his earphones so he could listen to a Marc Levin  and then a Econtalk Podcast.

Fifty Five Wuxi Expats hospitalized after Super Bowl Party

Fifty Five Wuxi Expats attending a Monday Morning Super Bowl Party at the Chestnut Pub had to be sent to hospital.

Twenty Five of the Expats were hospitalized on account on food poisoning. Wally Droop's Kangaroo Stew turned out to be made with tainted meat.

A further thirty of the Expats were hospitalized in the immediate post-game celebration. The group of thirty male expats, from Ontario, Canada, who were cheering for the New England Patriots, didn't let the fact that their team had lost from taking off their clothes, rubbing their bodies together, dancing and chanting "Ha ha ha! Stupid Giant Fans! Beaten by we were you!" Acting Chief Inspector of the Wuxi China Expatdom Police Force, Officer McNulty, attending the party and cheering for the Giants, took exception to the taunts, but would have let it go weren't it not for the bad grammar. McNulty felt compelled to set his troop of Rabid Helper Mountain Gorilla Constables on the Ontarians.

Officials at the Wuxi China Expatdom Number One Paying Patients Hospital said that the Ontario Expats would be in hospital for a month or so. "Even with the latest laser surgical technology, it is going to be hard to extract copies of the Cambridge Grammar of the English Language, third edition, from their foreheads!" said WCENOPPH spokesman Marius Welbroski.

Wuxi China Expatdom Vineyards produce the World's Finest Wines

Wuxi China Expatdom Vineyards now produce the World's finest wines. So says Joseph Robert, editor of the Wine Speculator, the world's foremost Wine magazine, who told the WCE Blog that Wine connoisseurs the world over should forget about going to Bordeaux France, Burgundy France, Wurzburg Germany, Tuscany Italy and the Napa Valley in California. "The top twenty Vineyards in the world are all in the Wuxi China Expatdom!" insisted Robert.

That the Wuxi China Expatdom should have so many outstanding vineyards is incredible, given that in the last year of the reign of the former King of Wuxi, the Ayatollah of Mordor, the Wuxi China Expatdom was rated as the worst producer of wine in the entire universe. Lord Acton, the eminent Wuxi China Expatdom historian, told the WCE blog that at that time, the Ayatollah had placed all of the WCE's award-winning wine-makers in a dungeon producing scrap metal and kool-aid powder. "More proof of the darkness that was the reign of the former King of Wuxi!" said Acton, who was visibly unable to control his divinely righteous indignation, after being forced to recall the dark times.

"But with their release after the coronation of King Gorzo the Mighty, the wine-makers, with encouragement from his Majesty, began to grow the finest grapes for wine-making in all the world on the rich succulent soils of the shores of Lake Taihu and of the slopes of Yangshan!" said Baron Burgundy Bordeaux Tuscany Napa-Smith, the chief viceroy of the Wuxi China Expatdom Wine Makers Association (WCEWMA)

The Baron waxed poetically, like he was talking about a young girl he was fervent for, as he rattled off the many fine wines grown and produced by the WCEWMA. "There is Chateau Meicun 2011: a full-bodied burgundy that teaches one the meaning of the word sublime. Chongnan Crest Cabernet Sauvignon Zhongshan Road Reserve 2010 is easily the greatest Cabernet of all human history! And of course, my personal favorite Difang du Lao Dianshilu Chateaujiu-de-Baba-Hui-Shan-Lu 2011 which is made by the brothers Du Maurier. This red wine is a blend of 65 percent Grenache with 15 percent each of Chateau Meicun and Taihu Tuscany, plus a dash of Tsingtao, Crown Royal, Clairette and other varieties, all sourced from vines averaging over 100 years of age."

Editor Robert said that the Wuxi China Expatdom, would continue to have the finest vineyards in the world if it continued to have its current decent political leadership and laisez-faire economic policies.

Sarajevo Bosnia and Herzegovina Expatdom becomes colony of the Wuxi China Expatdom

The Wuxi China Expatdom has it first European Colony. The Expatdom at Sarajevo in Bosnia and Herzegovina has applied for and been accepted as the latest colony of the Wuxi China Expatdom.

Head of the SB&HE delegation to the Wuxi China Expatdom, Abulah Sidran, cited the Wuxi China Expatdom having a cutting edge S&M culture and its liberal attitude toward human-inanimate object matrimony as the reasons for their wanting WCE colonial status. "Thousands of SB&HErs are planning to come to the WCE to marry their transistor radios !" said Sidran.

SB&HE will officially become a WCE colony when Archduke Harry Moore, the Wuxi China Expatdom Minister of Colonies, pays a visit during which he will take a motorcade tour of Sarajevo riding in a restored 1911 Gaft and Stift Double Phaeton automobile. "We look forward to the visit of the Archduke!" said Sidran.

For his part, His Majesty, the King of the Wuxi China Expatdom, Gorzo the Mighty, welcomed the SB&HE becoming a WCE Expatdom. "I anticipate that many more European Expatdoms will want to become WCE colonies and adopt the WCE Dollar as their official currency!"

Wuxi China Expatdom Minister of Colonies given a royal title.

Harry Moore, the President of the Wuxi China Expatdom Appreciation Society, the Wuxi China Expatdom Minister of Colonies, a two-time inductee into the Wuxi Expat Hall of Fame, and the only live person to be ever canonized by the Catholic Church has received perhaps his most prestigious title yet. Today at a press conference held at the Press Room Gold of the Wuxi China Expatdom Monarchical Palace, his majesty King of the Wuxi China Expatdom Gorzo the Mighty decreeded that Harry Moore was now Archduke Harry Moore by virtue of being god father to one of the royal triplets, Prince Hayek the Mighty.

His Majesty said he was proud to think of the Minister and President Moore as family. "There is room at the Mighty dinner table for another raccountuer" declared His Majesty.

Archduke Harry Moore, who was on the way to Paradise Island to impregnate the female Amazon population was unavailable for comment.

Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President to deliver lecture at Ford's Theater in Washington D.C.

Wuxi China Expatdom Film Appreciation Society President Harry Moore has been invited by the Washington D.C. People's Film Appreciation Society to deliver a film talk  at the Ford's Theater in Washington D.C.

The occasion of the speech at the historical theater will be the grand opening night screening of the new movie My American Cousin starring Joseph Jefferson, Laura Keene and E.A. Sothern.

President Moore, who is also the Wuxi China Expatdom Minister of Colonies, will deliver a lecture on films about the U.S. Civil War after the screening.

Wuxi China Expatdom Police Squad Officer McNulty has Helper Gorillas

Not to be outdone by other Expats who have helper monkeys, the acting Chief Inspector of the Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Police Squad, Officer McNulty, has acquired a whole troop of rabid African Helper Mountain Gorillas to to be employed during routine investigations, riot control, questioning of suspects, and enforcement of Expatdom by-laws and English grammar rules.

"The Mountain Gorillas, all male and smokers, have been feed Viagara and made to quit smoking cold-turkey, to ensure they are in heat and thus at a maximum level of ferocity." said Officer McNulty to a packed standing-room-only press center of the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion of Gambay's Pub in the 1912 Bar District of Wuxi, China.  To demonstrate the gorilla's ferocity, McNulty released one of his helper-gorillas, named Constable Snuggles, into the crowd -- seven reporters from the New York Times were torn to shreds before McNulty said "bananas."

"The Gorillas have also been taught to ride horses!" said McNulty to the surviving Press Men.  The remaining media, from Fox News and the Wall Street Journal and the Wuxi China Expatdom blog, gave McNulty a standing ovation.

In all, the Wuxi China Expatdom Royal Mounted Helper Gorilla Police (WCERMHGP) will have a hundred members.  McNulty says they will be deployed immediately at the new Wuxi, China Nanchang Jie Bar Street.  "There's a lot of bad grammar spoken there!" declared McNulty.

Wuxi Expat loves a good fairy tale more than anything else

Chester Gilbert, a Wuxi Expat journalist, says he loves nothing more than a jolly good fairy tale.

"If forced to choose between playing a video game, watching a moving picture, going to a live play, watching automobile races, participating in an orgy with local girls, getting drunk, having experiences, streaking down Zhongshan Road, reading the Poolside Harry Moore, going to a Pub, reading the latest news, watching a sporting competition, riding in a open-air vehicle with a pretty girl by my side, making fun of continental Europeans, laughing at Italians, speculating about what English people do at boarding schools or eating a vegemine sandwich, I would say toss them all and tell me a jolly good fairy tale!" said Chester to the WCE blog.

Asked why he felt this way, Gilbert said "For one thing, all those other activities are over-rated.  Reality is often a fraud.  Ordinary things are more valuable than extraordinary things.  I trust old wives' fables to old maids' facts.  The things I believed and enjoyed most when I was young, are the things I most enjoy and believe now:  fairy tales.  They seem to me to be entirely reasonable things.  They are not fantasies but sheer common sense.  And I don't need to lose my senses, to enjoy myself!  It is more interesting to me to hear tales of fairies that dance in the grass than to hear about people smoking grass or doing it in the grass!"

Wuxi Expat has the apartment of his dreams

Thor Lyndon, a Wuxi Expat, has his apartment set up as he wants it.

"It is the apartment of my dreams!" says the 38 year old English teacher. "I have a big screen 3-D television in bed room. I have my play station. I have my comfortable bed in front of the television. I have my swing set set up, so that on either side of the television, there is pretty local girl in a bikini swinging and on call to satisfy any of my immediate craven desires. I also have helper monkeys to do the cooking and cleaning. Who can ask for anything more!"

It was at this point in the interview, that Acting Wuxi China Expatdom Chief Inspector Officer McNulty burst into the apartment and shouted "That's who could ask for anything more, you reprobate!" McNulty then administered his personal and idiosyncratic brand of retributive, parsimonious, equiponderant justice towards Lyndon. The girls in bikinis, being impressed with McNulty's virility, left with the officer.

Lyndon's helper monkeys were seen trying to pry two copies Fowler's English Usage from his forehead.

Prince Charles Arrives In Wuxi China Expatdom To Inspect Our Privates

"Ohh, I say! Tell me, are they real?

Err....but I really do think you ought to stay well-away
from the Chestnut!".









[alternative captions, anyone?]

General Col Harlan Sanders Delivers First New Super-Tank To Wuxi China Expatdom's Garrison

Wuxi China Expatdom's Army Chief General Colonel Harlan B.Sanders
rumbled through the throngs of overjoyed Expats as he brought in the first of the
giant new tanks. Minister of Colonies Harry Moore, ever-eager to gather more raconteur-material, was granted an exclusive interview with the General.

The General-Colonel said that this new tank will soon be joined by
a further 600,000 similar models, which will form the backbone of the WCE's massive military might. "My old buddy General George S. Patton contacted me", said the General.
"He told me that when he was pulverizin' kraut tanks in the Bulge, his attention was caught by this example. After years of redesign and development, I give you the
Super King Tomcat!! And look-out when this beast growls!".

The General told Harry Moore that the WCE's new armoured-fist is powered by no-less than four Westinghouse-Mercedes Nuclear Turbines, delivering around 285 million horsepower. "Armament?", boomed the General, "why, it's got a 788mm cannon just for starters! Range is unlimited!".

The triumphant entry was briefly marred by an accident. The Wuxi China Expatdom Midget Sumo Wrestling Champion Duston Short, trying to get a close-up photograph, was trammelled, yet he emerged unscathed and told concerned onlookers that he'd "enjoyed much it, very!".

[*Note:- the photographer of the above-image cannot be contacted. If any Expats are able to identify this Wuxi China Expatdom location, could they please contact the writer or the editor-in-chief, please].

Wuxi China Expat has Eclectic Taste in Music

Andis Kaulins, the English Teacher who is not be confused with the Andis Kaulins who is the president of the Wuxi Expat Rifle Association, has eclectic taste in music.

Asked by the WCE blog, what music he liked, ET Kaulins said he liked Frank Sinatra, late 80's alternative bands like the Smiths and New Order, the Sex Pistols and the Clash, the Who, Tom T. Hall, Toby Keith, the Wings, Early David Bowie, the Velvet Underground and the American Songbook, especially anything that was Cole Porterish.  "Who else do you know who would like such disparate kinds of music?" asked Kaulins.  

Asked to comment on the musical taste of ET Kaulins, the great music critic Harold Mooreski said "that unlike other people, you wouldn't be able to determine the musical tastes of ET Kaulins by looking at his birth certificate.  He is truly able to transcend his age and milieu, and like music honestly without regard to the opinions of others!"