Sunday, February 5, 2012

Wuxi China Expatdom Vineyards produce the World's Finest Wines

Wuxi China Expatdom Vineyards now produce the World's finest wines. So says Joseph Robert, editor of the Wine Speculator, the world's foremost Wine magazine, who told the WCE Blog that Wine connoisseurs the world over should forget about going to Bordeaux France, Burgundy France, Wurzburg Germany, Tuscany Italy and the Napa Valley in California. "The top twenty Vineyards in the world are all in the Wuxi China Expatdom!" insisted Robert.

That the Wuxi China Expatdom should have so many outstanding vineyards is incredible, given that in the last year of the reign of the former King of Wuxi, the Ayatollah of Mordor, the Wuxi China Expatdom was rated as the worst producer of wine in the entire universe. Lord Acton, the eminent Wuxi China Expatdom historian, told the WCE blog that at that time, the Ayatollah had placed all of the WCE's award-winning wine-makers in a dungeon producing scrap metal and kool-aid powder. "More proof of the darkness that was the reign of the former King of Wuxi!" said Acton, who was visibly unable to control his divinely righteous indignation, after being forced to recall the dark times.

"But with their release after the coronation of King Gorzo the Mighty, the wine-makers, with encouragement from his Majesty, began to grow the finest grapes for wine-making in all the world on the rich succulent soils of the shores of Lake Taihu and of the slopes of Yangshan!" said Baron Burgundy Bordeaux Tuscany Napa-Smith, the chief viceroy of the Wuxi China Expatdom Wine Makers Association (WCEWMA)

The Baron waxed poetically, like he was talking about a young girl he was fervent for, as he rattled off the many fine wines grown and produced by the WCEWMA. "There is Chateau Meicun 2011: a full-bodied burgundy that teaches one the meaning of the word sublime. Chongnan Crest Cabernet Sauvignon Zhongshan Road Reserve 2010 is easily the greatest Cabernet of all human history! And of course, my personal favorite Difang du Lao Dianshilu Chateaujiu-de-Baba-Hui-Shan-Lu 2011 which is made by the brothers Du Maurier. This red wine is a blend of 65 percent Grenache with 15 percent each of Chateau Meicun and Taihu Tuscany, plus a dash of Tsingtao, Crown Royal, Clairette and other varieties, all sourced from vines averaging over 100 years of age."

Editor Robert said that the Wuxi China Expatdom, would continue to have the finest vineyards in the world if it continued to have its current decent political leadership and laisez-faire economic policies.

1 comment:

  1. Ach du lieber!
    Naturally our cherman vines ist das besten in ze welt.
    "trink...trink...

    ReplyDelete