Tuesday, July 19, 2011

New Language School Opened in Wuxi China Expatdom

The well-known WCE Expat, Doctor-Professor Bodil
Bent-Troels Poulsen (pron. 'pool-sen'), has bolstered the Expatdom's
world-famous reputation as a seat of learning by opening his new
Danish Language Polytechnic here.


Prof. Pool-sen ('Poulsen'), originally from Copenhagen, is the Dean
of the new Danish school. Situated in a prominent alleyway in the 1912
Bar District, the school is equipped with the very latest, state of the art
teaching facilities, including a blackboard, two desks, quills, and ink-wells.

The erudite and entrepreneurial Professor is also appearing in commercials
on the Expatdom's television channel, promoting his innovative "Danish Made
Easy" learning program.

In the TV advertisements, Prof Poul-sen says "Would you like to impress
your friends and family by being able to speak fluent Danish? "Well now
you can, using my book and audio CD kit "Teach Yourself Danish in Only
One Week!". "That's right, I personally guarantee that if my method doesn't
have you speaking liking a great Dane in just one week, well, then, you
obviously must be an ignoramus".

"Just think, next time you saunter into Gambays, instead of greeting
your Expat friends with the same old "Hi there, my chumsy-wumsy darlings!",
or, the banal "Git outta my way, you rotten drunken punk-b_ _ _ _ _ d!!",
you'll be able to say "jeg vi det, jeg boole kobenz nee-oogun, nee-oogun!
"Durg smurk lurken det-en ogern noof boegh klooken-nooken ti og!

"De fornuufta og samvittighed og de bor hendle moogen? "Oh, broderskabetskursuen
nee-urn urken urken, hmmm!".

"So, order my Danish kit now, payable in easy instalments of just
US$580 per month over 240 months - go on, pick-up your mobile and call NOW!"

2 comments:

  1. Is there a Swedish School opening?

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yes, but not a formal Swedish 'school' as such.

    That miscreant Dirt Express man, down in the
    Railway labyrinths, has been receiving conversational-Swedish "lessons" from the Bikini women.

    That's why we need to rapidly extract him from out of there - we don't want another Patti Hearst-syndrome problem on our hands here.

    :)

    ReplyDelete